Small Miracles
If I told you what I’ve endured either you wouldn’t believe me,
You’d walk away or you’d laugh, or some combination of
All three.
I’m not looking for the sort of validation I used to want.
I’m not expecting to lead a cause and
Drive others home to freedom.
I want what God wants for me.
I pray for that every day.
And then I trust that whatever happens
Was God’s will for me that day.
If I prayed for the things I thought would make me happy,
I’d pray for a loving and faithful and attractive husband.
I’d pray that I’d move someplace quiet and where the tenants (or lack of them)\
Did not burn incense, spray perfume, plug perfume heaters in the wall,
All to cover up the smell of marijuana. (I prefer the smell of marijuana.)
I have allergies and a sensitivity to scents of all kinds.
At least pot smells natural.
How I have managed to live in a den of aroma and the squalor,
It’s all about boundaries (talking to real people to their real faces)
And sending love. As crazy as that sounds, it works.
Lack of sleep and stress is often the recipe
For crazy. But I just keep bearing with it,
Meditating and sending love.
It’s a miracle, really.
#